Your presence matters
Matthew: You and Anne, you’d be better off if I were gone.
Marilla: What? I won’t have you talking like this.
Matthew: My life insurance. It would hold you both in good stead.It’s what I wish for.
Marilla: Why would you wish that? We need you here.
Matthew: No.
Marilla: Anne loves you. You have to remember that.
Matthew: But… her future…
Marilla: Which do you think she would choose? This house or you?
I paused at this conversation for a while, where Matthew was lying sick in bed and actually considering taking his own life, so that his family could have enough money to survive.
It got me thinking, how the people we love often find it hard to believe we’d really choose them over anything in the world. We’d choose being in their presence over any sacrifices or material gains they’d want to give up for our sake. And if we had to, we’d totally choose to spend forever listening to their mere silence, over even a second of any beautiful sound their absence might potentially give rise to.
It lately feels like we’re constantly in need to give others more reasons to continue loving us. To choose us. To want to be around us. When in fact, those who matter will cherish our existence for the simple fact that we are who we are. Their hearts won’t need to justify why they beat so magically when we’re around. The smiles that unintentionally break through their faces when our eyes meet theirs, will never carry any question marks. Because love never has to be so conditional.
Love never has to push you to prove that you deserve it. Love never has to watch you go so many extra miles to justify receiving it in return.
You‘re loved.
You’re chosen.
Your presence matters.
Because you’re so simply, you.
Even if you need your own Marilla to remind you of that every once in a while, none of it will ever stop being true.
💕
