I don’t know about you, but I’m lately realizing that when someone shares with me their genuine thoughts about something that scares them, and that happens to scare me too, in some way, it scares me less. Even if it used to completely terrify me earlier.

It’s almost like there’s this dark space somewhere inside me that keeps piling up more of my fears, but when those fears get to hear someone mentioning them from the outside – explaining the feelings associated with them, or simply acknowledging their existence as valid forms of the human experience that are encountered in some other dark space out there, a light almost instantly shines inside. The kind of light that’s able to pick up this exact fear, separate it from all others, and take it somewhere that feels safer.

A space inside me that makes fear feel safe.

So it’s not like it no longer scares me, it’s not like I no longer feel it, it’s just that it changes settings and I’m able to see it in a different light. Where there are no creepy shadows on the wall. No squeaky sounds that I keep trying to ignore. It’s just the fear, lying there, possibly trying to sneak back to the old dark space. Because even if it didn’t feel safe over there, it was still familiar. And it’s where all other fears hang out anyway. So when I forget to explore it right after it’s pulled out, when I let it stay there and forget about it for a while, it crawls back inside. And what once used to scare me less, joins in with a different kind of energy and starts scaring me a lot more than it ever did before.

Until someone else comes along again and shares with me their genuine thoughts about something that scares them, and that happens to scare me too.

Please talk to your loved ones (who you know will understand) about the things that scare you more often. You never know who’s in need of some light. And you never know how much of it will be reflected right back at you once you speak up. 🤍