Dear self,

You’ve gone a long way. You really, really have. On most days, it might feel like you’re exactly where you’ve always been; you haven’t moved forward, you’re still stuck in the same mental loops. But you and I, know you very much aren’t. We both know it’s usually just a phase of losing some control over our thoughts, and that we can still make it through with a little bit of acceptance.

I know it because, when you’re not paying attention, I can tell the difference.

I feel your heart beating much gentler.

I hear your thoughts growing a lot more tender.

I see you smiling back at the mirror like you’ve never doubted a single feature.

I notice the way you’re becoming more eager, about all the things you’ve long been ashamed to admit you need to learn them.

I listen to the nice things being said about you, then watch as you finally believe them.

I sense the subtle cracks in your voice, that you now always follow with an unconscious pat on your shoulder. It makes me smile, every time.

We still have a long way to go, and yet that’s never meant to belittle any of what you’ve overcome already. Please take the time to appreciate it, because only you know about all the pain that came along with the process.

Dear self,
Thank you.

Basma Zaki