There isn’t a single person I know of right now who isn’t affected by this in some way. There isn’t even one discussion I have that doesn’t revolve around it, and my social media platforms are bombarded just as much. Everyone’s worried, everyone’s confused, everyone’s anxious. And everyone has the right to feel the way they do. Because it is scary.

So many things already happen in life that remind us we’re not in control, but very few of them happen to be this universal and loud. Very few of them mess with our collective sense of control and direction this much. And so it has to make us pause and think.

About all the things we’ve gotten used to, that are only ever stable because He wants them to be. About all the things we’ve been prioritizing over the years, that instantly move down the list when something this big hits this hard. And about all the things we’ve tightly held onto, thinking we have any say on how long they shall last.

Despite all the reflections and the reminders though, one thing that’s on my mind these days is, how grateful I am to have God to turn to in times like these. I don’t think I would’ve felt safe without the blessing of making duaa. Of putting my worries into words that can bring peace to my heart; just knowing He’s heard and that He understands. I don’t think I would’ve stayed sane, if it weren’t for my ultimate trust in Him, and my belief that there is wisdom behind all that takes place, even if I never get to process it all. I don’t think I would‘ve been able to calm my anxiety, had I not been so sure that whatever He has written for me will find a way to happen even if I hide behind my door and never leave home.

It really breaks my heart to think someone else might be going through the worst time of their life because of this, and not being able to turn back to a God they believe doesn’t even exist. It really breaks my heart to think someone might be going through this alone, not realizing how very close He is. Because He is near. He’s watching. He’s allowing it to happen. He’s in control. And He‘s offering a lot through which we can remember Him, contemplate, and eventually heal.

It shall pass. inshaAllah.

March 14, 2020