February 16, 2020.

A day I had no idea was meant to forever be engraved in my memory, with all its details. When I woke up that morning, I was as excited about life as I’d been for the last couple of weeks. I had no idea God had different plans for me; the kind of plans that would completely paralyze my brain (and life) for the rest of the week, and turn me as emotional as I’d never been.

It’s the day a crazy reckless rich dude decided it was more important for him to take a call than to freaking look at the road ahead while driving. And accordingly caused serious damage to 3 cars other than his. I happened to be inside one of them.

I came out fine, alhamdulillah. With some minor physical pain. But nothing inside my head has been the same ever since. It took me a few days to be able to say I’m fine and really mean it. And it’s still taking me time to be able to write down my thoughts without striking through my every line, because the right words aren’t coming naturally to me anymore. And because when they finally do, they bring along an endless flow of tears. And yet, I keep realizing I’m unable to write about anything else but this, and only this.

So, I’ve decided to come back here. And do exactly that. Write about it, until I feel I don’t need to write about it anymore. Write about it, until the words help me heal. Write about it, so the things I’m coming out of it with would last with me.

As much as I’d really love to rewind back to a time when all this hadn’t happened, I am grateful it did. Because it’s still one of those eye-opening experiences. That hurt so much yet teach. That make you cry your eyes out yet remind you to take your time to heal. From things you might have never thought you’d find inside. But they’ve always been there. And here I am, trying to bring some of them out.

Bismillah! 🙂