Adronitis (n.): frustration with how long it takes to get to know someone—spending the first few weeks chatting in their psychological entryway, with each subsequent conversation like entering a different anteroom, each a little closer to the center of the house—wishing instead that you could start there and work your way out, exchanging your deepest secrets first, before easing into casualness, until you’ve built up enough mystery over the years to ask them where they’re from, and what they do for a living.

- The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

I’ve lately been obsessed with giving things names. Or rather with finding names for those things that only ever seem to make sense inside my head, and that I’ve never tried explaining to anyone before because of how I thought they’d sound weird outside.

But this... this was something else. I only came across this term yesterday and I could hear the loudest mental gasp I ever experienced in my head as I read this.

I wish I could explain this feeling. Coming across a term that validates a part of me. One that I had specifically been made to believe I should feel bad about. Because it only meant I’m impatient. I don’t give things the time they need. I don’t have it in me to watch as things slowly unfold the way they’re meant to. I’ve always wanted to dig deeper, and my frustration at how this wasn’t exactly reciprocated has led to things that left behind some emotional scars. Ones that I’m still unable to completely heal from.

Reading this though, felt like a real pat on the shoulder. An assurance that this urge to go beyond just the outer-shell right away, isn’t really weird or uncommon. Someone out there actually experiences it, and it makes so much sense to them, that they’ve felt the need to give it a name.

So yeah, I just wanted to put this out there for anyone who might have had to swallow in that part of themselves, too. In fear that they’d sound too much, too odd, or maybe too strange. You’re not. It’s actually a thing. It’s an awesome thing about you, and about me.

Maybe one day you’d cross paths with that someone who’d get straight to where you both feel you want to be. And maybe then your “Adronitis-ness” would finally make sense to both of you. (: